As a coach, I am often asked, “What could I do next?” or “What job would suit me best?” These questions typically arise from the overwhelming number of options available, leading us to believe that we must meticulously analyse and evaluate each one before making the „right“ decision.
A common approach is to reflect on past experiences—identifying moments of fulfillment or energy in previous jobs or tasks. By analysing these moments, we attempt to craft an ideal future, believing that understanding past happiness can help us design the perfect career path. We then create a plan to achieve this goal.
We achieve our goal—then what? What happens when we reach the destination but still feel unfulfilled? (we have matured and different needs)
We don’t reach our goal—leading to frustration. The pressure to achieve a predefined „perfect“ job can leave us feeling stuck or disappointed.
Interestingly, many of the most fulfilling moments in life—meeting a life partner, discovering a passion, stumbling upon a new opportunity—happen unexpectedly. These experiences often arise not from deliberate planning but from being open to chance and recognising opportunities.
What if, instead of trying to control every outcome, we focused on recognising and creating opportunities?
Of course, structured goals like education and training are essential, but even those decisions are often shaped by chance encounters or unexpected influences.
To spot opportunities, we need to widen our view. In coaching, we do this for instance by:
We recognise more when we have words for what we experience. In coaching, we practise describing everyday situations from different angles—building vocabulary, awareness, and insight.
It might sound paradoxical, but we can create the conditions for opportunities to arise—by experimenting.
Trying new things—without rigid expectations—opens the door to discovery. In coaching, this often involves:
Many of the patterns that once protected us are now holding us back. Freeing ourselves from them unlocks energy for growth and change.
When opportunities do arise, how do you know if they’re right?
By knowing your values. Values help you spot what’s truly meaningful—and meaning is the core ingredient of lasting happiness.
In coaching, we also explore:
These are deep questions. And sometimes, the answer is accepting that no decision is perfect—and that’s okay.
Coaching isn’t about finding one perfect answer. It’s about widening your view, creating alternatives, and making choices based on awareness—not fear.
Many of my clients come with a strong analytical mindset. But what often works best is an experimental and sometimes even playful approach.
After all—if thinking harder solved it, you’d probably already have the answer.
It’s our job to make a difference that make the essential difference.
